I am very excited (and nervous) to announce the first publication of one my short stories. My brain is a little all over the place, truth be told. I am as much daunted by the prospect as I am over the moon.
Here, let me pour out my mind soup, so you can see what’s going on:
I HAVE FINALLY ACHIEVED STARDOM – THE MUSE HAS SWEPT ME UP AND DELIVERED ME UNTO THE ANNALS OF HISTORY AS THE WORLD’S GREATEST WRITER – ummmm, steady on, what if my story’s shit? What if – actually – the first thing I’ve published is a steaming turd? – NO, IT IS A GREAT ACHIEVEMENT – oh shit oh shit oh shit – GO FORTH AND BE MERRY, FOR THIS MONUMENTOUS OCCASION NO DOUBT HERALDS FURTHER SUCCESS – every single literate English-speaking human has read it and they know my picture and they think I’m a total muppet and they’re laughing at my stupid face behind my back – IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO LAUGH AT SOMEONE’S FACE BEHIND THEIR BACK – oh God! What if my story is riddled with incongruous metaphors? IT IS A GOOD STORY, FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE, GIVE IT A REST – I will not give it a rest, it’s called humility and doubt, you overbearing prat, maybe I should just not tell anyone – NO, WRITE A BLOG POST AND SHARE IT ON FACEBOOK – but then people might read it – THAT WAS THE POINT, WASN’T IT? – I don’t know! – GROW UP – Oh shit oh shit oh shit…
Oops, let me just close the old noggin there.
I’m erring towards Mr Shouty Brain, though – after all, I did write to be read, so I really ought to tell people when I have written something, right? So I’ll post this, and then go and hide in the pub for three hours.
So! On with the self promotion…
My short story Tartarus appears in the Hell-themed horror anthology The Infernal Clock – twenty-four tales of terror told from each hour of the day.
Mine is set at 5am, and involves drugs, dancing and dildos, so naturally my Mum will be extra proud.
Naturally, all events and characters are entirely fictional, while the experiences of drug abuse and hallucinations are derived from secondary research, of course – not through arduous sampling, as you might have assumed from my vivid and honest portrayal.
I’ve not yet read the rest of the compendium, but I know those involved are a talented bunch, incorporating published authors, flash fiction aficionados and a spattering of newbies, among whom I count myself.
The Kindle version is available now, here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B06XZDXG9Z and is available for free for those lucky devils among you with Kindle Unlimited.
Print versions will be available by the end of the week, apparently.
(Sodding hell, a printed book, with my name in it. I’ve already read my story on my Kindle this morning, and that was amazing enough. I will be a gibbering wreck of pride and doubt when I see my name in an ACTUAL BOOK.)
Anyway, the next time I get something published, I will try to be much more professional and calm about the whole thing. In the meantime, however, please excuse me while I squee.